Bring back the old Masterchef

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Bring back the old Masterchef

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In the 1990s, BBC's "Masterchef" was a mainstay of the TV schedules. It had the perfect presenter in Loyd Grossman - not quite a cook; not quite a TV presenter. There was no messing about. The best dish won. End.

Not so now. It's presented by a greengrocer and a French chef (who doesn’t sound French). It's laced with dramatic music and peppered with vacuous catchphrases. "Cooking doesn't get tougher than this!"

Yes it does, Greg, it gets a whole lot tougher. Have you ever cooked rice at gunpoint in a Japanese prisoner-of-war camp in the jungle in 95% humidity? Have you prepared a meal in space? No. All you've done is stick a fork into a plate of sauteed grouse tongues and grunt, "I like your thinking". It's tosh.

The government must force the BBC to put an end to this nonsense. Wherever Grossman is hiding, find him and bring him back. Make it illegal to use the words "ganache", "feuilletine" or "noisette" on British TV. Whatever it takes, just do it.

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