Submitted on Thursday 4th December 2014
Published on Monday 8th December 2014
Current status: Closed
Closed: Monday 30th March 2015
Signatures: 1
Tagged with
Economy ~ UK ~ Unemployment
Classify Candy Crush as a class B drug
Candy Crush Saga (and it's chemical derivative Candy Crush Soda) are potent narcotics that can lead to severe psychological issues ranging from obsessive compulsive behaviour, hallucinations and cravings for sugar-rich foodstuffs.
These apps can also lead to finger and wrist strain, tendonitis and insomnia - users having reported closing their eyes only to see colourful grids of candy.
In extreme cases users have resorted to changing the time of day on their mobile devices in order to earn 'extra lives' so their addiction can be satisfied, throwing off the proper mechanics of the timekeeping of millions of users, which leads to unemployment and loss of worker productivity, adversely affecting the already fragile economy of the UK.
Classification of this menace to a class B drug reflects the nature and severity of the symptoms of this application in line with similar narcotics already classified as such.
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